How Do I Know Where to Start?

So many times when I’m sitting with a new client, I am asked a question that goes something like, “How do I know where to start?”  When it comes to healing the emotions, sometimes we know that there has been a particular event that was emotionally traumatic, and it makes sense to start the healing work there. But many times my clients have problems with depression, with anxiety, with a relationship, or with ADD/ADHD, and they simply don’t know where to begin. That’s primarily because they don’t know what the root cause of this depression, anxiety, or other emotional issue may be. They may look at their lives and feel that everything on the surface looks fine…they may feel that they don’t have any particular reason to feel depressed or anxious, so they will just keep trying to prop themselves up regularly with the old High School Cheerleader Pep Talk. You probably know the talk…the one that goes something like “STOP the complaining already! You have it SO much better than a lot of people. You have food to eat and a roof over your head and a job that takes care of your needs and people who care about you. Anything else is just fluff. Now pick yourself up by the boot straps and get moving!” Although I am very much in favor of optimism and a good solid work ethic, I also believe that it’s important to listen to our bodies and our spirits. If our bodies are telling us that something isn’t right, it’s good to give that sign some attention. Otherwise, in my experience, the signs simply keep getting bigger and bigger until we have no choice but to listen and to take action. In the long run, we can save ourselves a lot of heartache if we think of life’s little stumbling blocks as signs of things that we need to heal…and that we WANT to heal, for our own good and for the good of our loved ones.

Having my roots in both traditional Western Medicine and what is considered “Alternative Medicine” in the United States, I have learned the value of asking the right questions, no matter which approach I am planning to use to resolve a problem. There is nothing more important than taking a good history of the current problem. It invariably leads to some clues as to what is going on. Of course, the value of asking questions is based very much on the person who is asking the questions. The effectiveness of this step is dependent upon having someone who can accurately interpret those answers and apply the results of their questions to the process. Finding someone who knows how to ask the right questions can be invaluable to getting you on the path to healing.

In most cases, the next step to healing lies in doing some testing. You may think of testing in mainstream medicine as a blood test, an X-Ray or an ultrasound. When I work with clients on emotional issues, I use what is called Applied Kinesiology, or muscle testing, in order to allow the body to tell me where there are blocks or disruptions in the normal flow of energy in the body and the spirit. This tool is one of the very best tools that I use in my work with clients. By using muscle testing, we are able to pinpoint not only the specific emotions that are involved, but also the time in the client’s life that this emotion originated and who else was involved in the event. People are often shocked at what their bodies have held onto, because their conscious mind may not have had any recollection of this as being a “significant” event. Yet that often occurs because of the very same situation that I described above…a person has chosen to give themselves the pep talk instead of admitting that there is an issue that needs to be resolved. In so doing, they have denied that there’s a problem. And denial, although temporarily effective at controlling negative emotions, only leads to having to deal with the same problem again and again until it is healed.  And that, my friends, is a total DRAG. 😉   

The final stage of this process is where the REAL fun begins. 🙂 With the testing completed, and in consulting with the client in the interpretation of the test results, an answer (often times SEVERAL answers) will emerge. This is where the “fixing” comes in. And I am the first to shout from the rooftops that the fixing isn’t all about me and the work that I do in the situation. Rather, the fixing requires the collaboration of BOTH of us…We are TOGETHER holding the intention of clearing out this disruption in the body and the spirit. I believe that God has created a special place of healing that comes about when two or more people join together with a common goal of increasing the love and joy that is present in a situation. And I have had the great pleasure of being in that space with many, many people, often at some of the deepest and most painful points in their lives. Seeing the pain and the sorrow slip away as the truth emerges, as they begin to feel less and less pain and feel more and more pure love for themselves and for others…I can only describe it as the essence of healing, and as the essence of Divine Love. It is truly remarkable to witness. 

So are you asking yourself that question, “How do I know where to start?”  It’s possible that this is the wrong question. You already know where to start. You already started when you decided to give up your denial, and when you decided to seek others to join with you in your pursuit of healing. From there, it’s about trusting the person you joined with to help bring about your healing. It’s about trusting your body to say what it needs to say to that person who also knows how to interpret what your body is saying, and it’s about being open to and intentional about what you are asking.  Divine Love and forgiveness will bring it all together in ways that are often higher and greater than what we can imagine.            


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